Yours, mine and ours (but really mine)

When a break up occurs there will be a period of gathering his junk that is at your house, your junk that is at his, etc.  That is normal.  No need to do it in person, that is what US Mail is for (and they are hurting for money right now so when in doubt, MAIL IT).  Once you have your property, consider that chapter officially closed.

Sounds good but I have a Kidlet.  She tends to go with me.  She is only (almost) 8 years old.  She was not around the latest XBF for the first year since it was casual.  Once we reconnected, she was included in our plans.  Not always but she would be around him on weekends and trips over the last two years.  She is very much my daughter as she is cautious about people but I would be lying if I said that she didn't like him (sometimes more than others).  She appreciated it when she was shown attention or presented with gifts but as always with kids, there are good moments and bad moments.  We had different thoughts on discipline and when it is my kid, my rules win.  Regardless of all of the miscellaneous details that do not matter now, she is not an "ours", she is a "mine".

The last time that she saw him was a few weeks before the official split and it was a happy time.  I'm glad that it happened like that.  He and I are on limited contact on an "as needed" basis.  Not because I hate him but because, our chapter is closed, dead, The End and we are moving on with our lives.  I have a plan for she and I and I am starting to see some good things happen.  You live, love, learn then move on.

So when I told The Kidlet about the split the day after, her response was, "I'm sorry Mommy.  Can we go get ice cream"?  Kids!  She is very much in tune with what is going on with me than I give her credit.  A few weeks ago if she knew that I was having a sad day, I got a Grade A Kidlet and lots of love.  When I gained my clarity,
 and she knew that I was "back in full force and not looking back" she is back to being a booger.  God bless her.

XBF asked to send her a birthday gift.  My thought, why?  She is fine, I am fine, why keep lingering the ghost of BFs past?  I know that he is being thoughtful since it is her birthday so I'm going with the flow.  I know that she would be happy that he thought of her and then, she will be on to something else like any other kid.